I was listening to the song linked below when I had a sudden thought. I have done the one thing I wouldn’t do for love. Now, if like me, you’re fascinated by conspiracy theories, you’ve probably heard the rumor about how the elite of Hollywood supposedly sell their souls to the devil. I remember when I first heard this. I thought, I would never! The control freak in me could never have believed there would be a day when I too would sell my soul while under the influence of Ayahuasca or anything else for that matter.
I didn’t intend to sell my soul to the Devil, though. My purchaser was Unconditional Love. But, I had forgotten about the fine print, the non-duality clause.
Selling my soul was the thing I would not do for love because relinquishing control was the one thing I would not do for love. But then, that one night during an Ayahuasca ceremony, I begged unconditional love to take my soul. There had been no solicitation. I just threw myself at it insisting it take me. It was irresistible. I never thought I could say yes like that. My resolve to never lose control to that degree, simply dissolved. In the weeks and months that followed that forbidden fruit ceremony, I began to more intensely experience the concept of non-duality.
And eventually, I came to realize that I see God and the Devil as two sides of the same coin.
Let me start my explanation by telling you that some conspiracy theorists say following the light after death is a trick. But I think ultimately, the trick is that the light, God, is just the other side of the shadow, the Devil. They are one. This mindset, my father would say, is to where sin has led me. The wages of sin is death. And eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil did, indeed, result in death. But with it, came the gradual understanding that death is just the other side of the birth coin.
Besides, to be born again, don’t you first have to die?
Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. ~John 3:3
It was a sin for me to eat from the tree of the knowledge of non-duality. Thus, the wages of sin is death. And death is where hell’s fires burned much of the bliss of my ignorance which fueled all my previous definitions of heaven including the most traditional one. And from the incinerated’s ashes, a new description was born. This link is where I have already written my most basic thoughts on why I think the Kingdom of Heaven and the Kingdom of God are probably one and the same.
And when he was demanded of the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God should come, he answered them and said, The kingdom of God cometh not with observation: Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you. ~ Luke 17:20-21
I’m reminded of the rising Phoenix who destroys itself with the fire that also burns its old ideas and theories.
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. ~ II Corinthians 5:17
From its ashes, the Phoenix rebirths itself along with new ideas. And I have a new idea about an old Scripture.
No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon. ~ Matthew 6:24
What if those two masters were really one and the same like the Gemini who found its Genius in being both itself, a Mercurian trickster, as well as its co-joined twin and opposition, Sagittarius, the truth teller and straight shooter? Or, what if it’s like the seasoned Pisces whose internal tension between its own duality is so finely calibrated, that one could almost forget it’s two fish swimming in opposite directions?
And what if being born again is a resurrection process; one which comes from maintaining a balance so steady that it is reminiscent of a mature Libra Sun or maybe, an oh-so-ripe Libra North Node? And what if Heaven is the ability to maintain balance by properly calibrating one’s own internal tension? Right now, I can’t take a better shot of this lovely yellow lady in the picture below because she’s packed away in a box. But don’t you think ahe looks like an embodiment of the Libra weighing scale? I do.
So I call her Lady Libra.
I do not know her origin story. Tyrone spotted her at an antique store while we were out having fun one day and I bought her. Back then, I didn’t know much if anything about Libra. And I certainly didn’t know my North Node was there. Of course, like others from my generation, my Pluto is also there. In the pic, her buckets aren’t attached because I was working on finding the best way to make them stay. I guess that is a good metaphor for my life as well. I’m working on finding the best way to make balance stay. Or should I say, the best way to keep my balance?